Overheard in Halperin House Lounge:

Girl: Hey, that's not funny. There are a lot of non-religious Muslims.

Overheard in Hallowed Grounds

Yeah I went home this morning to eat breakfast, shower, and masturbate - the perfect way to end finals week.

Overheard at C-shop

Guy: "Foucault on Institutions? Ha how easy would that test be"

Overheard at Bartlett: “Haters gonna have a shorter lifespan”

(honest-to-god overheard in the A-level)

Guy: " How bitchin' would it be to be a paraplegic and have laser eyes?"

In the basement of the Regenstein:

Facilities Manager: "Well, I'm going home. Have a nice, relaixng weekend."
Facilities Worker: "... weekend! Ron, it's only Tuesday!"

Guy at party: "I mean, why a parrot squawking over William S. Burroughs? Why not a monkey taking a crap over Humphrey Bogart?"

Overheard on A-Level:

Guy1 (to girls passing by): "Hey there, sweetcakes!"
Guy2: "Do you ever try not talking, Rob? What if you just went through your life never talking. Ever think abou that?"